About him
Country of origin: |
United Kingdom | |
Location: |
Newtownabbey, Antrim, Northern Ireland | |
Gender: |
Male | |
Age: |
53 | |
Star sign: |
Capricorn | |
Height: |
6' 1" (185cm) | |
Body type: |
A few extra pounds | |
Looks: |
Attractive | |
Hair colour: |
Dark Brown | |
Eye colour: |
Hazel | |
Relationship Status: |
Separated | |
Looking for: |
Activity partners; Friends; Let's see what happens | |
Have children: |
Yes, living with me sometimes | |
Want children: |
No | |
Daily diet: |
Eat most things | |
Smoking: |
Never | |
Drinking: |
Occasionally | |
Education: |
University / College student | |
Occupation: |
Political / Government | |
Income: |
Comfortable | |
Ethnicity: |
White/Caucasian | |
Home language: |
English | |
Other languages: |
Ask me later | |
Religion: |
Agnostic |
About his ideal match
Country of origin: |
Anywhere in the World | ||
Location: |
Within 40 miles of postcode district BT37 (Newtownabbey) | ||
Gender: |
Female | ||
Age range: |
20 - 50 | ||
Star sign: |
Any | ||
Height: |
5' 1" (154cm) - 6' 11" (210cm) or taller | ||
Body type: |
Any | ||
Looks: |
Any | ||
Hair colour: |
Any | ||
Eye colour: |
Any | ||
Has a photo: |
Slightly important | ||
Relationship Status: |
Any | ||
Have children: |
Any | ||
Want children: |
No | ||
Daily diet: |
Eat most things | ||
Smoking: |
Any | ||
Drinking: |
Occasionally | ||
Education: |
Any | ||
Occupation: |
Any | ||
Income: |
Enough | ||
Ethnicity: |
Any | ||
Home language: |
Any | ||
Other languages: |
Any | ||
Religion: |
Any |
- Not important at all
- Slightly important
- Moderately important
- Decidedly important
- Non-negotiable
In His Own Words
About him
CUDDLY Morbidly obese. A date would necessitate the removal of the roof and a whale sling. Cuddling is very unlikely, although squashing is a distinct possibility.
BBW Stands for 'big, beautiful woman'. Well, two out of three's not bad. She's certainly big and female. But it's doubtful many beholders will consider her beautiful.
SIZE 10 In Uzbekistan. On the UK High Street it's a completely different story.
FIERY Psychotic. Cancel a date with this girl and you'll come home to find your car has been keyed and all the sleeves have been cut off your shirts.
VIVACIOUS Aggressive. An opinionated finger-jabber. She's got views on everything and she's not afraid to ram them forcefully down your throat.
GREAT PERSONALITY Ugly as sin. If a woman is selling her personality, then her face looks good in a paper bag.
ARTISTIC Drama Queen. Welcome to a world of slamming doors, smashed crockery and huffy silences.
ATHLETIC AND TONED Flat chested and shapeless. A sexless, lumpless and bumpless Tomboy.
AGE 34 Age 43. There's more chance of winning the Lottery on a double rollover week than there is of being a woman over 35 and getting a date on the internet. It doesn't matter if the guy is 60, he'll still confine his searches to '35 and under', so any woman's age should be taken as a ball park figure.
PLAYFUL Hussy. Working her way through the internet site and it's your turn.
GIRLY Thick. Shallower than a mouse's foot bath. High School Musical is her idea of high brow. She can tell you the name of every character in TV teen drama Gossip Girl, but has no idea who the Prime Minister is.
About his ideal match
WHAT MEN REALLY MEAN
ATTRACTIVE Plain. Everyone in online dating is 'attractive.' In the real world it means 'pleasant to look at' - in the internet-speak it means: two eyes, two ears and a mouth.
FAIRLY ATTRACTIVE Gutchurningly hideous. When he's not even claiming to be attractive, it's time to worry. Andrew Lloyd Webber will look like a Calvin Klein model next to this guy. Meeting under the cover of darkness is advised.
TOLD ATTRACTIVE By my mother, the only woman I've every loved or am ever likely to.
RUGBY PLAYER'S BUILD One who retired 10 years ago. Stop thinking: Jonny Wilkinson. Start thinking: Johnny Vegas.
What His Friends Say
Gunsmoke hasn't asked any friends to write a recommendation yet.
More about him
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